Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

An important set of lessons were learnt this weekend by Burgess Hills Favourite Minor Celebrity. Never get a haircut when drunk. Never ask a man who is drunk to carry out that hair cut. And never, ever get a man whoms eyesight is best described as shocking and whom you have spent many years taking the piss out of for being bald himself to do the deed.

Yes, in the early hours of Saturday morning I asked Andy Rumble to give me a "quick trim." This quick trim saw him shave a huge line of hair off the back and then an even bigger chunk out of the front. Once this had happened, there was really no choice (well, there was of course looking like Jimmy Saville, but that wasn't an option). It all had to go. The result being that, for the first time since the birth of Scott McCarthy, I am bald. Not entirely bald - there is still a thin coating of hair - but pretty much, shiny bonced.

What has been cut can be regrown though - and I have no doubts that my hair will rise once again to be the envy of all of Christandom. And if it doesn't, then the world of the Gail Porter look-a-like awaits